I'm channelling Steve Bradbury right now ...

So this week, my boss of seven years walked into my office, sat down and told me a job a delightful piece of news.

I have been working in a higher duties job for more than two years, and three months ago, I applied for my job to made permanent and went to interview.

All good so far.

I felt confident and assured that my role was secure and that the splitting of my into two would finally give me the role I had been waiting for, for two years.

So, this week, my boss sat down and explained to me that I in fact came third in my job, effectively meaning, I didn't win it.

The first position was given to someone who wanted the other half of my old crappy job (fine, have it... hated it anyway) but the other half, was all I wanted. He told me that someone outside my work, applied and had won it, but then declined.
So... "we decided to give it to you, cause you were next..."

Oh gee thanks so much for the opportunity but how about you jam that up your tight arse and mind you manners. (I am aware by using that language, i in fact need to mind mine but .... no).

Before I had a chance to utter any words, my boss then tells me that, when he realised I had come third he started looking around for second rate jobs for me. Ok, he didn't use those words but after he told me where he was looking, it was.

"Luckily, it never came to that."

Thanks for that. I really appreciate you putting me forward for the crappy, second rate jobs, you believe I would be perfect for.

And then, last but not least, proceeds to tell me that he has ideas for my career and that he is going to look into other opportunities to further me in the organisation.

WHO THE HELL ASKED YOU!

I screamed this in my head, and avoided the urge to grab my keyboard. Of course, I am not one of those people but in the moment my whole body was blotchy and hot from holding the anger in. I felt humilated.

Last time I checked I was responsible for my career... but apparently I was wrong!
The worst part is that I don't feel like celebrating a job I worked my booty off for because they never picked me. They saw my corporate knowledge, my ten years experience in the field, and strong work ethic, as something to be disposed because someone else was at level. That was the only reason.

So I feel a little like Steve Bradbury.

I won the gold but don't quite feel like parading while the others are scattered all around me.

Steve Bradbury trained hard for his sport and frankly won the gold cause other idiots couldn't stay upright. It may have been a fluke but he still trained his entire life for that race and kissed that gold medal like he should have.

And maybe a few days from now I will feel like doing just that but right now I feel like tripping one of those smug Germans ...