Does getting teary in front of the boss make me look weak?

Apparently it doesn't.

Today, my boss called me into the office to ask me if i would accept an opportunity that required me to work longer hours and been kicked by the powers above, and I said no. I know!! I am surprised by my answer to.

So when he asked why I would not go, I just because I don't want to. This is first time I have actually said no to my boss. I have been given many opportunities and many shit ends of the stick tasks and still have said yes. But today I just couldn't do it.

I said no and my reason was that I just didn't want to because I don't want to be here anymore. I have excelled above and beyond my job and there is no where to go from here. I am not challenged anymore and I don't feel the need to prove myself to anyone, anymore.

He seemed quite taken back by my response and then my eyes started to get misty and I couldn't hold it back.

I don't cry. It's not my thing.

But this is the second time I have cried in front of two men, my boyfriend and now my boss.

It seems the floodgates have opened and I can't stop it.

For someone who doesn't cry, it is very frustrating to try to stop the drops coming down.

My boss was sweet and said he actually liked that I was crying (not in a bad way) but that I showed vulnerability. Something I have never before. And I think it showed him that I am committed to getting my ass out of that place and to somewhere new.

Today also reminded me that it is OK to show your vulnerable side. And it also reminded of other things to sacred to share on this blog.

P.S I hate people who cry to get out of doing something or use tears to manipulate someone. And today, I was neither. Phew!

Stop tailgating my car Canberrans!

Jesus!!! I can't say enough how crap Canberra drivers are.

They tailgate.

They speed.

They can't park.

They can't pick a bloody lane to stay in.

They don't know how to approach a roundabout, despite the fact my town is known for its roundabouts.

They don't understand the concept that breaking on a major highway is stupid and dangerous and that maybe you shouldn't be driving so close to my car that (a) I can't see your licence plate, (b) I can see you picking your nose, (c) you are driving a commodore, laser, ute, or basically a piece of shit that should be taken off the road.

I am judging you because I can, and YOU SHOULD BE!

My god... I have lived in Canberra, basically my entire life, and it makes my blood boil to see these idiots on the road. Not only are they putting my life at risk, they are putting their own and everyone around them and me at risk.

How did you get your licence?!?!

I tell you, come anywhere near me, and I swear god I will (a) slow down to trap you so you can't overtake, or (b) thump you because today I could have.

You're crap, and you should know it!

Speak up because I can’t hear you!

I actually deleted this entry but decided to put it back on because I want it here. 

I am an out spoken, lively and vivacious person.

I can’t read minds.

I can’t always read people’s actions.

I sometimes (more often than not) say things that may offend but it’s not intentional.

And most importantly, I am not a superhero.

I feel like I am in one of those wildlife documentaries where the gazelle is drinking by the lake and then a crocodile jumps and … well you know the rest.

I find it difficult to read one’s actions, feelings, motives, eye and hand movements…

So sometimes it nice to tell this gazelle what’s going, what your actions mean (if anything) or tell me what you think of this gazelle…

And like any documentary, it’s also nice to know if a crocodile, lion or poacher is in the room because this gazelle can’t hear you!

P.S I am aware I have meshed up some analogies but damn it, it's my blog.