Learnt my lesson

We had been dating nearly two months when he uttered the words that he couldn't make a girlfriend a priority in his life and I wondered why did he show all the signs that he was in a relationship and the words to go with it.

Why did he lead me on to thinking that a relationship was on the cards when in fact all he wanted was a women who asked no questions and put no pressure on him?

Why not stick to one night stands instead of spending time with me, meeting my friends and showing all the sickly touchy feel monogamous signs of a relationship and then pull the rug from underneath me?

Its sick.

How could someone do this to someone they claim they like and enjoy spending time with them?

Now before anyone says he must have given away signs of wanting nothing but a casual 'relationship', he didn't. He made it clear that he wanted a relationship with me. So what am I suppose to do? I can't badger him and make him sign it in blood. You take someone at their word. Otherwise why have a relationship with them. Why bother entering into a relationship at all.

At this point, he told me that he needed time to think about what I had asked of him and that he liked me and liked spending time with me. In hindsight I should have say goodbye there and then and went on my merry way but I didn't because he told me he liked me and wanted to be with me. Yeah I am sucker because I believed him and trusted him. I was wrong. Completely, and utterly, wrong.

So the problem was that we were completely attracted to one another and any chance of conversation went to wayside when we saw each other. It was hot but after three months of this my brain started to kick in and all thoughts to our conversation started to way heavily on my shoulders.

The last month of our 'relationship' he spent the entire time avoiding the conversation and used his work as an excuse to avoid me. So the jig was up.
I realised I had enough of being jerked around and disrespected by a man who was afraid of sharing his life with a woman whose only misfortune was that she wanted to get to know him.

When I finally got the courage to dump him, I stood in the room and desperately hoped he would look at me and see me. He didn't.

He watched television and completely ignored me. I knew it was over.

So I told him what I wanted from him and his only response was that work was busy, and he had a busy schedule with sporting commitments and he had no idea how I fitted into that.

I was about to walk away and went to him (because the ass couldn't be bothered coming to me) and kissed him goodbye. As I moved, he grabbed me by the arm and I thought, stupidly, that he had changed his mind. He didn't. He only offered his services to me. Oh I was a lucky girl.

I felt really special at that point.

As many of you don't know me, I am being sarcastic. I told him goodbye and walked out. He muttered something but I couldn't turn back and ask him what he said as I feared I would never leave the room and he convince me again to stay.

That was it.

Of the four months I spent with him, two months were wonderful, the rest was a disaster and I didn't want to accept it or face it.

I learnt my lesson not to waste my time with a man who was emotionally unavailable and dysfunctional to the hilt.

Well actually the lesson I learnt was to find out up front their deal and go from there. Life is too short to be wasting it with people who don't really want to stand next to you. That's what everyone wants.

A person who will stand next to you through thick and thin.